Life in 30 years...

I've read many lists recently about what someone should have experienced by the time they turn 30. I've decided I'd rather create my own "list" about what I myself have learned as my 30th birthday approaches. I don't like the idea of having to accomplish what others have expected me to accomplish by now, but I'd rather celebrate those things I have found important in my own life... Here is what I have discovered about life in 30 years.

Mom was almost always right. I say almost because I can't quite give her permission to be right about everything from here on out just yet ;) Mom always told me that I would miss "this." She always said that I would want to come back to different ages, and when I was in high school, and I was wishing my life away - she knew one day I'd miss it.

And, I do. I miss the simplicity of life back then. In finding my own diaries and reading the entries from 1996 recently, I realize now how much fun it would be to be able to go back. At the time I hated it, I felt like there was so much more out there in the world to experience and I was stuck. I couldn't wait for life to happen. What I failed to realize was, life was happening. My girlfriends and I used to talk all the time, we would spend Saturday nights getting dressed up and go dancing and to carnivals and fairs, and then we'd have sleepovers. 30 years has taught me to not take things for granted. Even if I think what's happening in my life at a given moment isn't enough, one day I'll miss it and realize how great it really was. 30 years has taught me to live in the moment.


Mom was right about what boys wanted back then, and she was right when she told me to focus more on me. I spent many years trying to find the right person, and mom spent many years worrying about my never ending search for the perfect person. It wasn't until I lived alone with my girlfriends and tried being single that I realized that searching for the perfect person is senseless, nurturing your own soul and becoming the best you can be is purposeful. That is when I was able to meet the right person. 30 has taught me that I am responsible for my own happiness, I can't depend on someone else to do that for me. I know I've found the right person because he has seen me at my worst and he still loves me unconditionally. This is the right relationship to nurture.


God will always give me the right friends in my life at just the right time. I've lost touch with many people over the years, but I will always love them. I see clearly what our purpose was for knowing each other during that season of our lives. 30 has taught me that I need to be more present in my friendships and tell them what they mean to me because there is no way of knowing when we may lose touch.

God's timing is perfect. It's useless to expect things to happen in my time frame because God has a plan for me. When he knows I am ready to experience something or have something, He will bring it to my life. 30 has taught me to be patient and trust God's will, because He has NEVER let me down.


My family has been tested through the years. We are a family that hugs, says I love you every time we speak, cries together, and laughs together. 30 has taught me that my family will be there for each other through anything and everything, no matter what it is, and I am lucky, because not every family is this way.

Time flies by. It goes too fast. Be happy that it's Monday, don't wait for the weekend to get here. 30 has taught me not to wish my life away.


Pets don't live long enough. 30 has taught me to take a break from my daily to do list, and lay on the floor with my dogs.


Growing up, I couldn't wait to leave my small town. Now that I've moved away I am sad thinking of what and who I left, knowing my kids won't know exactly where I've come from... 30 has taught me to appreciate my roots, and get back to them as often as I can.


There is no one else in the world exactly like me. My purpose in life is to inspire others and live my life so that those who may not know how to express their emotions will be moved to do so. 30 has taught me to live on purpose and be who I am, not who I am expected to be.

I've learned amazing things in the last 30 years in addition to what I've listed here. Quite frankly, turning 30 scares me. Getting older always scared me. But, if what I have learned in the last 30 years can inspire me to live the next 30 better than I did the last, than I suppose life is going to be pretty great!

Using the Past to create a Positive and Purpose Filled Future

We all struggle. Believe me. Our struggles may be different, but we must have faith in God that He will pull us through. We can't let Satan creep into our hearts. We cannot focus on the past, and what we could have done differently - all we can really do is truly be in the here and now. That's all any of us can do. God dropped a few quotes in front of me this week that have spoken to me. Perhaps they will speak to you too.

"God doesn't always give us the blueprint for our lives, but he always gives us the next step."

"Whether it's the best of times, or the worst of times, it's the only time we've got."

"Learn from the past, set vivid, detailed goals for the future, and live in the only moment of time over which you have any control: NOW."

This last one I really needed to hear. I have a tendency to focus entirely too much on the past. On things I can't change. I have a feeling you might too. We can't. All we can do is keep moving forward. Yesterday is over. Today is a gift - appreciate it. We can choose to accept our fate and make it a positive experience. Are you with me?

I wrote my purpose statement 5 years ago, and now I am finally learning how God wants me to put it into effect. "I exist to serve by inspiring others." What will yours be?

I want to help everyone I can. But more than ever I am feeling moved to help prison inmates. I want to help them see that life isn't over. Life doesn't stop because you are on the "inside." God is using them to do something - I want to help them learn how to allow God to fill them with His spirit, and let the change take place. God wants all of us, including inmates, to use our experiences and make an impact and difference in the lives of others - it would be selfish of all of us not to use that gift. I want to help them to make that shift in thinking - take what's happened to us - and affect others. Make the shift from being externally directed and internally focused, to being internally directed and externally focused.

God recently placed an old friend in front of me. He's a part of my story in this life, as I am in his. He shared with me the impact I had on his life many years ago. Without my knowledge over the course of the past 12 years, our chance meeting, changed the way he lived his life. In his words, "Because of you I began to look at things around me a little bit differently....changing the way I look at the world. I began to believe in things like perseverance and what just a simple smile can do to someones day, just to name a few. Years and years ago I would have never known that for a brief moment in time a person could dramatically enhance an others life so profoundly!"

God truly is amazing. Miraculous, really. What this recent encounter with my old friend has taught me is that when I am lost, God will lead me back. If I continue to live my life on purpose, I will continue to make a difference, just as I did with him. And just as he had done - and continues to do to me.

May the Holy Spirit move you to inspire, may he move you to find peace. I'll keep on writing because it completes my story - you all keep on living a purpose filled life...

Managing Your Emotions

I have been in the worst of moods lately, a terrible funk, distancing myself from those I am closest to ... perhaps it's my depression sneaking back up on me, or possibly just an overactive moment of OCD. You see, once I get a thought in my mind, I can't seem to shake it. So when my emotions start to roll in another direction, away from the life I am living - I tell myself that God must be telling me something. He must be warning me that "I'm unhappy, and should run away." I've done A LOT of running away in the last 13 years because I thought God was telling me to. Some of the running was in the right direction, other times I later felt regret... So, how in the world do we figure out what God is actually telling us to do?!

I've been asking myself recently, what is your purpose in life? What are your core values? During a work conference this past week, I heard, "Peace of mind comes when your life is in harmony with YOUR true principles and YOUR values, and in no other way." Certainly, my behavior, actions, and thoughts the past few weeks were not in harmony with my principles and values. God wouldn't want that. God would not make me feel something that would tempt me to go against all of my beliefs. He would never encourage that. If I trust in God, he'll get me through these emotions and lead me appropriately in whatever direction He wants me to go. He'll do it the right way, not Satan's way.

I've let Satan take control recently - and I, with my faith in God, need to climb back up out of this hole and back into the light.... I have not yet figured out how I am going to do that. But I have discovered that acknowledgment is the beginning. I can no longer just run, I must grow. Once I do, God will lead me exactly where I am meant to go next, and it will be invigorating.

I've just started a book - one God led me to, called "Managing Your Emotions, Instead of Your Emotions Managing You" by Joyce Meyer. I am only on page 17 - but I know that it's going to help me see the light a little more clearly.

I'd like to leave you with one key point from the book that I'm already taking away:

"There are times when the Holy Spirit is leading us to do something, our emotions become involved, so we get all excited about doing it. The emotional support helps us feel that God really does want us to do the thing. We perceive the emotional support to be confirmation of God's will.
At other times, the Lord will move us to do a certain thing, and our emotions will not want anything to do with what God is revealing to us and asking us to do. They give no support at all.
At those time it is harder to obey God. We are very dependent upon emotional support. If we lack understanding about the fickle nature of emotions, Satan can use them - or the lack of them - to keep us out of God's will. I firmly believe that no person will ever walk in God's will and ultimately in victory if he takes counsel with his emotions."

So - with that said, my emotions can't be trusted these past few weeks. Satan has taken complete advantage of that and led me far from God's will. God would never lead me to His Will by making me go against everything I stand for, Satan would. My prayer to God is to lead me back to Him and forgive me for straying...